Today was a day of grieving for me. Grieving what once was, what could have been and what never had a chance to be. Once I peeked behind the door, the waves of sadness came in a rush and consumed me…until I had no choice but to surrender. I curled up on my couch with my beloved dog and let the tears flow. I let every feeling surface from heartbreak to anger. I didn’t realize how many things I had been bottling up or trying to be “tough” about. Every last one of them was unearthed and released. The cleansing started with a good sobbing session, then moved into my studio for a few hours resulting in a flurry of expression and creation, and ended with a solo sail on my beloved boat. By the end of the day, my mind, heart and soul were clear. The sadness is still here, and I honor it, but it is no longer choking me as it was.
It had been ages since I had set foot in my studio, and it felt like coming home…to my truth and myself. I am so grateful for my creative practice. Even when it isn’t at the forefront of my life, I know it is always there like a lighthouse on a rocky shore. No matter how long it has been, I can always find my way because of that steadfast light, and I can always dive in and access the power and healing of making art.